“Honey, I Think I’ve Wrecked the Kids!”
You haven’t wrecked your kids. Just change the game plan. Discover the surprising parenting hacks that are so easy they shouldn’t work.
“Our tactics were failing, and we felt overwhelmed!”
The key to change is recognizing the different stages of the child’s misbehavior and how each one is an escalation along a path from attention, power, revenge, and then avoidance. If not properly addressed, this can escalate into a never-ending power struggle.
It’s critical to understand your child’s thought-process and goals of the misbehavior; understand who they are and what drives and motivates them.
Misbehavior comes from unmet needs; when children don’t feel understood, acknowledged, connected or discouraged. Changing your game plan away from the punitive, dominating, punishing, or manipulating into compliance model. Rather learn to identify and address the unmet need and shift towards a democratic parenting approach.
Make the shift from a reward-and-punishment model to a democratic model and your children will thrive.
You can have happy, cooperative, well-adjusted children. You just have to change your game plan and break the outdated programming handed down to you from your parents. The democratic model is an easy-to apply method to transform your child, changing their behavior for the better. This type of change goes deeper than rules and boundaries. It is based upon a foundation of understanding, warmth, and respect.
The democratic model provides the tools necessary to recognize “why” your child is misbehaving and provides easy-to-apply tactics to deal with certain behaviors. It’s important to understand that your child is acting a certain way for a reason.
Behavior has a purpose and it serves the child’s immediate needs no matter how unreasonable the behavior may seem to the parent. Once we understand the motivation behind the behavior, and analyze the negative behaviors rather than reacting, we can truly understand what your child is “really” after. From that understanding you can respond appropriately. And importantly, you will provide guidance in a more calming way and communicate in ways that they can understand.
This approach is non-judgemental, respectful, and logical. Further, it empowers and encourages your children, enabling them to blossom and grow with confidence. You will respect your child’s boundaries and respond more diplomatically as you teach expectations, mutual respect, and responsibility. As a result, your child will learn to act and communicate in a more positive way.
“We tried the democratic parenting style…and watched our children blossom into autonomous, well-adjusted individuals.”
When you apply the tactics from the democratic parenting model you will see the transformation:
- Heal the discipline issues and attention problems
- Watch your children blossom into empowered, cooperative, loving, well-adjusted individuals
- Learn the skills to help your child release frustrations before they escalate
- Build a deep, respectful, connection with your child
- Empower your children to make better choices
- Stop the constant fights, resistance, and power struggles
- Gain and understanding of the outbursts and power struggle
- Instantly defuse your child’s tantrums
Parenting Counselling Services in Vancouver
Jennifer Lee is a Registered Clinical Counsellors with a specialty in parenting. Don’t struggle needlessly Contact Jennifer at our Vancouver counselling office to find out how she can help you.
You Don’t Have to Struggle
Change your game plan today and watch your children blossom…and your blood pressure decrease!
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